Ankur Banerjee

Ankur Banerjee

Tuesday, January 27, 2015


I'm in a Relationship.

-"seriously? are you in a relation? How can you even manage such a thing?"- asked me a Man.
A man with no accurate knowledge of what a relationship is, or what it feels like?

I dont understand what is so unique about being in a relation. you can be in one, I am in one, and everyone deserves to be in a relationship. A relationship with a girl/boy whom he/she Loves.

LOve!!! A four letter word, around which every single Humans heart revolves.

Luv is wen aftr u break up purposely callin ur
partner n sayin..
"SORRY galti se lag gya adat thi na "
Luv is wen u say I HATE U...I HATE U...n ur partner
smiles n keeps on sayin...
"You cant...i bet...You cant.."
Luv is wen u realise no one in dis wrld cn b as swt as
hr wen she smiles
Luv is wen u wnt 2 hate dat unknwngly u
strt lovin that prsn.
Luv is wen u snd a gn msg n cnt sleep till ur
partner's rply cums... .
This is true luV..
.And after reading the above lines who comes first in your mind that is your love!

 Now, about Relationship,

I wanted to be in a relationship where She can wear my large t-shirt at night.
We both can sleep together in one bed.
We can be like kids making silly faces and doing baby talks...
I can shout at her when I’m mad, then she’ll hug me tight so I’ll shut up.
She’ll pull me close to her so I won’t have the chance to let go.
We’ll watch horror movies together, I’ll kiss her secretly then she’ll smile.
We’ll fight, but not that much. We’ll break up but get back together few days after.
She’ll make me the luckiest boy in the world.
And I’ll be the only Man she loves...

Thats Love for me, and that's what I have always got from Ninja.

I am in a relationship which is just the way I wanted it to be, with  the girl I wanted it to be.


Tuesday, January 13, 2015

Don’t give up on love, read this instead!

Many times we wish and wish for the right person to come into our lives. We don’t seem to understand why it’s not working out with others. We end up in toxic, unloving relationships, and deep down know something better is out there. 

The challenge is, when something better does come along, to not run away.

After years of disappointment, heart break and unhappy endings, it can be very easy to close down on real love. No matter what, don’t’ let that happen!
Remember, strength in the muscles of your body is created by your muscles being ripped apart, and then rebuilt. Your heart and your emotional intelligence and fitness operate the same way. It is easy to close down after you’ve been hurt. It’s easy to throw a wrench into real love when it comes. I understand it’s scary, but WHO CARES

Move forward in spite of your fear. Move forward INTO the scariness of it all. Be courageous. Don’t let fear win. OPEN UP anyway. The risk of not opening, in the end, is far worse than the risk of opening.

Don’t let love pass you by. Don’t let fear win.

NO! Instead, let love win. Open up, even when, you are afraid. Open up, even when you are scared of getting hurt. Open up, even when you don’t know what’s going to happen.

Listen to me: LOVE WILL PASS YOU BY if you always choose the safe path.

I am not suggesting that you open up to the first person who comes along. No. I am not suggesting that at all. I am suggesting that when you have a connection with someone, when you feel it, when you are so scared of how much you feel it, go in the opposite direction of your fear. Do not be afraid of the love you feel.

KNOW THIS: The right person will meet you. The right person will show up. But they can’t if you don’t open.

Learn to value openness and rebuilding your heart more than safety. Don’t let the wounds of the past create a wounded future. No. It can be different. Love can be yours. But first you must be open to it. Learn how to be more loving from your past pain, not how to be more closed.

                                             Don’t give up on love, no, give IN TO love!

Monday, December 1, 2014

Every thing that you'll hate to Love- For everything you'll love to Hate.

"your hands and eyes; the smell of your skin against mine. the way you carry on a joke for too long, and the way you explain yourself when I tilt my head at you. the way you talk about what you love to do; the way you say you love me. the sound of your voice over the telephone; even better the sound of your voice next to my ear. the smell of your shirt in my bed; the way I sleep a little better lately. the way I light up when I say your name, the way I say it every chance I get."

It's really hard to have to love someone or love to have someone around you for the same sake of feelings you would want to carry on for your life time. There are times when I hate it around Ninja, but not "hate it kind of hate it" but more appropriately "love it kind of hate it". So here is the main question, " Do I leave her an move on? or should I just sit and talk of things that I want her to improve, or I want me to improve basically to give our relationship a green flag?"

NO!!! Its not always what I want is what she always wants to do, neither is it the vice verse. But here we are together out of all odds and away from all difficulties with healthy fights and romantic eves and yes obviously with healthy fights I mean pretty hard and difficult to sort out  fights metamorphic-ally speaking.

GIRLS- Girls can be hard to understand sometimes, even I never did understand them, and I speaqk that so as to compliment them to keep their secrets intact, and in fact its so deep within that nobody gets to know who she is, until she lets him know who she actually is.

we'll I would love to tell something about my "WIFE", (yes i would prefer to say that- so what we aren't married?) which is common with every single girl I suppose-

"She’s stubborn and hard headed but god knows I love her. There are days when she’s grumpy for no apparent reason other than the fact that she’s grumpy. When she’s sick, she’s helpless and all you can really do is hold her in your arms and comfort her till she falls asleep. There are days when she’ll complain about everything like the weather, people, music, or even you and you’ll just have to deal with it. She’ll complain about the room being too hot, to only result in closing the windows in the middle of the night because she’s too cold. There are days when she shuts the world out;  she’ll ignore everyone because she just wants to sit in silence. Sometimes, she’ll claim she can eat an entire cow because that’s just how hungry she is. So we’ll make lunch plans and I’ll pick her up just to have her say, “I ate already, I was too hungry but I’ll still eat a little something.” There are days when she suffocates me with love. She’ll kiss and kiss and kiss, till I beg her to stop. She’ll tickle me until my insides hurt and hold my hand till it’s sweaty. There are days when she’ll claim every part of my face with her lips. And there are days when she’ll need her space and I’ll have to pull a chair up alongside her because she just needs her own space. There are days when her hair is messy and all over the place. Days when she’ll cry and you don’t know why but you won’t ask you’ll just let her cry. Days when she’s nervous and jumpy about everything. Days when she yells at me for no reason just to apologize two seconds later. Days when she’s a pain in the ass and pushes my cheeks just to settle it with kisses. Days when I’m listening to my favorite song and she’ll talk over it because talking is more important than music. There are days when I need her to make decisions, to do the littlest things like pick a place to eat. She’ll refuse and say “I don’t know” until I give up and decide myself. Sometimes she’ll swear like a sailor and make jokes during times when she should probably be serious. There are days when it’s 3 in the morning and she won’t let me sleep and days when she’s too tired and fast asleep by 10pm. Sometimes she’s clumsy and sometimes she’s a walking contradiction; but she is everything I’ve ever wanted. I’d do everything to have her bad days, her grumpy days, her “I need space days,” her love me days, her laughing days, her clumsy days, and her happy days, because she is everything I’ve ever wanted and I wouldn’t dare trade her for anything in this world."

Baby??      This probably means I love you.Learn to love and live from me <3

And that's how I learned to love a sad girl and comfort her with what all I can do just to have a smile on her face by doing just simple little things-

 1)       Kiss her forehead. Kiss her eyes. Kiss her nose and the birthmarks on her skin and all the places she does not love. Kiss her knuckles and her fingers and remind her to breathe. She needs that. All of it.

 2)      If she cries, your first question must be whether she wants you or not. Some days she’ll need you to crush her boundaries completely and pull her so close that her heart can beat alongside yours. And some days she’ll need you to let her drown a little bit on her own, but you have to come back for her, after. Always come back.

 3)       Do not yell at her. If you’re angry, write it down or leave for a while to cool off and then have a level-toned argument with her. Do not yell. Do not ever yell.

 4)      Tell her you will be at her funeral. And when she asks how you can be so sure you’ll outlive her, tell her you’re not sure of that at all. Tell her that even if you die tomorrow, you will be at her funeral.

 5)      Do not ask her why she is sad. She will tell you. If you truly love her and if she knows that, she will tell you.

 6)      Open her curtains. She’ll cringe and groan and make a scene, but she needs the light. She doesn’t know how to make her own sunshine, so you’ve got to give her some.

   7)      Llet her tell you about things. Let her ramble on about a poet she loves or why she hates a certain singer. Let her bitch about her workday or describe how much she loves her brother. If you don’t let her talk to you, she will never let you know her.

   8)      Llearn how to identify whether her eyes are stormy or calm. Learn her tones of voice and how to tell if she’s really okay or if she just doesn’t want you to worry. Learn her tells and her soft spots. And love every last one.

   9)       Take her places- coffee shops, antique stores, city streets and your kitchen. She wants to see the world, and she wants to see it with you.

   10)    Kiss her toes. Kiss her shoulders and place butterfly kisses on her cheeks. Touch her hair and tell her all the things there are to love about her. Remind her to scream if she needs to. She needs that. All of it.

That's it, That's all YOu need to do just to comfort her, know her, love her and be with her.
World is a small place to be in but a large place to stay when you have some one to love you for what you are, as I do- I love her for what she is, not for what I want her to become.

Friday, November 28, 2014

"MAN" on Poetry...

Men- A second kind of species in Human race created by the AL-mighty, and often forgotten of, because everyone is either busy pleasing a girl or discussing their problems and yea obviously those discussions and problems are of girls and women.
Let me ask of a very normal question
Have you ever heard of a song- a love song dedicated to a MAN?
or let us take it this way, Do anyone remember any song dedicated to Men? because yea there are songs on boys but neither people really knows about them nor they want to know.

Here you get an answer where does this species rest in mankind, they do have feelings, a heart to love, eyes to cry and hands that work really hard to make a world an easy place to stay in for the girl he cares about, or child he is father to.

They Love, Care, and is Honest to the one he loves .
"Falling in love feels like an accidental occurrence to many people, but in spiritual terms it is not -- it is the entrance point to love's eternal journey." 

Ultimately what men and women want is the same -- they want to feel connected, they want to feel attraction, and to experience passion. A man is looking for a woman with a smile. Men bond with women when men feel successful in making them happy. A woman needs to focus less on making her man happy -- and focus more on how he makes her happy.

And one example of such LOVE, from someone who loves, cares and is honest to his WIFE and CHILDREN is what we need to read and learn from.
He is 50+ years old but is still romantic enough to write and speak in ways we can rather think of. He in his way spoke about his love to his love, who was somewhat angry on him, and managed to get her back before the feelings hurt her, and bring a soft smile on her face.

This is about Mr. Aggarwal, kudos to his Love towards mrs Aggarwal, and his ways of expressing it in front of her and this is what he wrote in his anniversary this year when mrs. Aggarwal got angry on him and reading it left her on tears and feeling loved as always.

Here it Goes...

Dukh se, Dukh se nahi thi Yaari,
Kyonki jimmedari thi hamari.

Jab tak nibhate rahe jimmedari,
Tab tak naastik the hum vichari.
Aaj jab Dukh ne ki hai dosti yaari,
To hum bhi ban gae Aastik vichari.

Aaj jimmedari nahi thi humari,
To dukh ne dosti ki humari.

Jimmedari me sukh tha jeewan yapan,

Lekin aaj dukh ne china apnapan.

Bari ajeeb leela hai tumhari,
kabhi khushi, kabhi gamm ki di hai bimari.

Kabhi naa khush the wo humse,
Aur kabhi naa khush the hum unse,
Kyonki vicharo me bhinnata thi humari.
Aaj 22 saal ho gae shadi ko humari,
Lekin samajh na sake ek duje ki vichari.

Hume pyaar jatana nahi aata,
tabhi to unhe muskurana nahi aata.
Muskurate hai hum to veefarte hai wo,
kyonki pyaar unhe paana nahi ata.

Shak me wo ulajhte rahe,
Tabhi to wo veefarte rahe.
Na jane kyon Hum ,
                     Fir bhi unhi pe marte rahe.

Jeevan kabhi chandni raat hogi,
yahi soch kr jeevan jite rahe.
Tabhi to hum ise,
                   Shaadi ka samjhota samajhte rahe.

Khaai thi kasme jine marne ke,
Tabhi to hum marte marte jeete rahe.

Guruji ko jab sunaya humne,
To muskurae Guruji bole humse-
Ye kya aachari, vichari,
Jimmedari laga rakha hai?

Khade raho yahi,
             Saja hai Tumhari...

we all deserve the love that we give, and desire it to come back to us.
where we say- " All of me Loves all of you. Give your all to me, I'll give my all to you
You're my end and my beginning, Even when I lose I'm winning
Cause I give you all of me, And you give me all of you."

Love isn't that easy to find, nor is it easy to stay in Love.
So take care when you fall in love, and when you are in Love.

Because, there's no feeling like Love, nor there will be.
Have Faith, Have trust, win over love,stay in Love, make Love and grow Love as you grow old. So, when you are 80 and you have you partner sitting with you with her head on your shoulders and her hands in yours, You can smile at her and say- "Baby you are old now, but you now what? 
I lost my strength now, but I can still try and hug you that tight as I used to do, and kiss you the way I always did, and the only change in that will be that I'll be teeth-less... I wont be biting you any more."


Now thats LOve. hehhe!!

#feelingloved                               #marryouanyway                        #dontmatterwhatyousay<3

Tuesday, November 25, 2014

“Good relationships don’t just happen. They take time, patience and two people who truly want to be together.” ~ THOUGHTS.
My Girl Friend and I were going through a difficult time since a few months. It felt like a pivotal time in our relationship. People say that commitment isn’t easy and you have your ups and downs. Well, we were definitely experiencing a low point.
We had been together for several years; we had been college sweethearts and were each other’s best friends.
During this time we had several issues going on in our life, one of which was my GF being out of interst and trust, and suffering with anxiety, depression, and a lack of self-esteem and confidence as a result. Our relationship was in a bad place and we were being tested.
We were not spending any quality time together, nor were we going out together as a couple (my GF loved herself more than she loved US).
We didn’t feel like each other’s friends, let alone the lovers and best friends we had grown to be. At times we even felt like strangers—or even worse, each other’s enemies. We were forever fighting, bickering, and whining at each other.
After a lot of heartache and many heated arguments, we realized we could no longer go on like this. When we stopped to analyze the situation, we asked ourselves several questions:
Did we still love each other? Did we still want to be married? Had everything changed so much that we just couldn’t work things out?
Once we decided we wanted to be in our relationship, we each made a commitment to start treating each other differently.
We hoped that, with a new perspective and our mutual love and respect for each other, we could start working together and make the change we so desperately needed. We hoped that a change in attitude and behavior would salvage our Relationship.
The following four elements became very critical in our relationship and might help us retain our relationship, as well as making it stronger for the future. 
1. Communication.
During this rough period we stopped communicating clearly. It’s funny how, as human beings, we withdraw from each other when there is a sign of trouble or misunderstanding.
We decided to consciously work on our communication. We spoke in “I” statements rather than “you” statements.

We expressed how we felt rather than blaming a situation on the other person. “I” statements work because they show how you feel, whereas “you” statements create a sense of accusation and blame.
This helped us be open with how we felt, stopped us from shutting each out, and allowed us to talk about our issues in a productive and efficient way.
2. Appreciation.
We were feeling a lot of resentment toward each other, and not feeling loved and appreciated, so we put in place a daily appreciation comments. Keeping a personal Gratitude feeling is a great asset; it makes you focus on the positive in your life and leads to happiness.
Keeping a gratitude feeling as a couple had the same benefits and gave us hope. It forced us to focus on the positives of the day and not just the negative events or what the other person did or didn’t say. It made us appreciate the other person and see them for the person we fell in love with.

It also made us feel good to be acknowledged and appreciated for what we had done on a daily basis. It helped to hear the other person say thank you, even though we were being thanked for doing our expected roles—me, for going to ignore any small cliché of things done wrong between us, and Ninja for taking over a sense of responsibility, understanding and showing what she feels for me then just telling “what she feels”.
It was important for us to hear the gratitude from the other person so we didn’t feel like we were being taken for granted.
3. Quality time as a couple.
It was also helpful for us to schedule quality time with each other—getting out of the Hostels and spending time together away from all the issues of our life; taking the step back and just being with each other.

It’s important to set some time aside to just be a couple; spend quality time together regularly, but especially during hard times. This doesn’t need to involve money; just a walk down the park together or along the beach will help. Just taking yourself out of your hostel environment will be beneficial.
We enjoyed each other’s company once again and started to feel more happiness as a couple.
4. Showing love as the other person wants to receive it.
We both still loved each other, but didn’t really feel that we were loved. I’ve read books and articles about how people receive and give love differently. Your partner may not perceive love in the same way as you; and remember, someone’s perception is their reality.
How your partner receives your love is important. You can’t assume the other person knows that you love them.

For myself, I feel loved when people spend quality time with me, making the effort to talk to me and listen. Ninja, on the other hand, receives love by affirmations, people giving her compliments and positive statements.
With this in mind we made an effort to show each other love in ways that we knew would make each other feel loved on a regular basis.
By doing all of this we started to feel like we were in a loving marriage and that weren’t battling through our difficult life on our own. We had each other there for the support we needed. 
We look back on this time as a lesson learned. We feel proud that we got through it and grateful that our relationship is stronger. We faced the challenge and came out on top.
We now practice these simple things every day to grow together and maintain a good and loving relationship.
We can be confident that by using these simple techniques, we can face the many challenges life throws at us together, such as getting away for jobs and family disputes that come along at times when we bring our love in front of them.
If you are fortunate enough to share your life with someone you love, then you owe it to yourself and your partner to make an effort every day in your relationship.
They say love conquers all and that all you need is love, but unfortunately a solid relationship needs more than that. It requires being there for each other, showing support, feeling loved, being grateful that you are sharing your lives together, and above all, showing your appreciation every day.

Because that person is really LUCKY who has a –Best Friend,a -Girl Friend and a-wife out of the same person”

                          -Ankur Banerjee.